Easyjet Speedy Boarding…

Moment of obvious realisation: Easyjet has Speedy Boarding (&#0153 (probably)).

Okay, it’s totes been around a while and all, but really is it necessary? You pay dirt cheap amounts for dirt cheap tickets on a pretty dirty airplane where they’re trying to snatch every last bit of money off you for any small service possible. Even using a credit card or taking hold baggage. Crazy.

Anyway, so they (being Easyjet) launched this thing a while back and essentially you pay between £2.50 and £7.50 more (which in some cases is 50% of the flight price…) just so you can get on the plane a little bit earlier than everyone else. Great. You’re still in the same plane, you’re still sitting in the same seats, and you still get exactly the same service. What’s the deal. Even if you’re last in the Speedy Boarding queue then you’re a matter of minutes (if that) in front of the first ‘regular’ people. It’s just not worth it. Imagine if everyone spent that extra £7.50. Then you’re screwed. Although, statistically, not everyone will. But it’s the principle. You’re paying for a little bit more choice in where you sit. And maybe for the feeling of a moral high ground as you go through the gates a little bit earlier.

Well I’m not convinced. I get a perfectly good seat every time I fly. It’s not as if they’ve overbooked the plane. Everyone will get on. Eventually. And they’re not going to leave without you—especially if you do have speedy boarding. It’s just another minimal way of making money for the airline. Don’t fall for it. Unless you’re their target market, that is. If you are, you won’t realise it, it’ll be too late when you turn up at the airport thinking you’re just that much better than the next person. You’ll probably be wearing an Ed Hardy t-shirt, looking like a massive douchebag. Then it’s too late. Or you could be old, or obsessively panicky. Either way, you will get on the plane at some point. You could even get some kids, young ones preferably, and get them to get you on early. You would save the money. Anyway, what I’m saying is don’t be a target market. At least not of Easyjet. It’s a bad(ly paved) road to go down…

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